my story

I was born the start of the 2000’s, the peak of diet culture, carrying myself over 230lbs just at eleven years old and prediabetic in middle school. I was always an overweight kid, my family had no concept of portion control or nutrition (other than special K’s diet) My summers in Washington were spent covered in sweatshirts, multiple tank tops and shame. I was relentlessly bullied about my weight, I spent most of my childhood trying multiple diets that were aired on commercials and magazines; low-fat, protein shakes, juicing, Weight watchers, Special K, lean cuisine. You name it, I tried it.

As I grew up, my home life became way more chaotic and food became this blanket of comfort for me. I was what they called a “secret eater” binging throughout my middle school and high school years, hiding snacks in my room, never letting anyone see that side of me, although it was no secret.

Losing weight successfully with a history of a diagnosed eating disorder seemed impossible.

I spent years in therapy working through my trauma and exactly why food felt like the only real control I had in my life, even though it controlled every part of my life. It was only when I learned everything I grew up hearing about nutrition and weight loss was wrong that I started to open up to the idea it might not be so impossible to do this.

Although I had this history of trying and failing multiple diets, I managed to get out of the 200lbs in my late teens and sat around 180’s until the summer of 2021 when I decided I had enough. I wanted something permanent, the scale was never consistent and the way I had been consuming alcohol and food I was headed back to my old ways. I felt guilty, I didn’t believe in myself, but after seeing many women who had gone through the same struggles on social media I bought my first at-home workout program.

I learned around the same time how to accurately track everything I was eating (for the most part, I made a few mistakes over the years.) I downloaded MyFitnessPal after arguing with myself and trusted the process!

It wasn’t as easy as it sounds, I struggled horribly with food noise at the start of my weight loss. It wasn’t as fast as I hoped for, I was terrified of solely rely on counting calories and still convinced I needed a secret hack to actually make this work.

Since 2021 I have spent years learning how to lose weight, how to keep it off, how to build muscle while losing body fat and learn exactly what diet is right for me. During this time I fell in love with the process, learned how to manage my autoimmune disorder symptoms (and food noise!) I couldn’t believe I could transform the body I thought I was stuck in forever. I’m always reaching for a healthier and happier version of myself.

Remember time will pass, there is no “perfect time” to start investing in your health, so why wait?